Sunday, January 15, 2012

Solutitude

The City We Thought We Knew
8x14 inches

I have been living in my head.
Instead of going into my studio, I have been creating and painting in my mind.
Instead of writing in my journal or posting on my blog, I have been conversing silently with myself.
Am I resting for the next chapter in my creative life?
Or am I stalling?

I finished the piece above a few weeks ago. I like it. It stirs a conundrum of emotions. There's a sweetness, mingled with sorrow. A feeling of desolation and solitude. It doesn't depress or sadden me, but there is something a bit sad about the lone horse, traveling silently past the empty horizon. But when I look at it, I feel a sense of peace. I like the quiet.

My favorite time of day is the quiet time, before the noise of living is heard, speeding past my windows, in a hurry to get somewhere. Every driver, every passenger, have their own stories to live. So before most wake, I wake and I listen to the silence. And I feel a sense of peace.

That sweet time is when I reflect on my blessings and send my gratitude out to the universe. I sense the presence of my husband and two dogs and relax into the safety of their love.

This year my resolution revolves around grace. Being more open, less critical, more loving. less judging. Living up and out, instead of in and down. Which means I need to get out of my head and into my studio. Take my hands off of the keyboard and get them into some paint!