Sunday, October 11, 2015

Midnight Perfume

Reverence Immortalized
Midnight Perfume
We had a midnight visitor all summer.
We recognized him by his strangely, peculiar scent.
Now that summer is over,
so is his life.

Midnight Soliloquy
It's me, just out for my midnight stroll, the moon my very bright companion, investigating the wonders along my busy trail. I respectfully leave my aromatic calling card so you will know to leave me be. 
I haven't been woken in a couple of weeks by the pungent smell of our neighborhood skunk. I believe I know why. I was driving down a street close to our home and I saw a delicate, little black and white shape, lying unnaturally still, in the middle of the road. 

Unlike most people, I like skunks. Thanks to Warner Brother's French aristocratic Pepe Le Pew; watching his black and white antics, trying to capture love. How could I not love a skunk that loved to love; was in love with love?

The little woodpecker above was lying in our driveway when I got back from a walk. So eloquently poised, as if recalling some long forgotten memory.  I placed him in my garden. 

This brings me to the subject of this blog. If we believe that all beings are sentient, (which I do), how can we leave these animal beings scattered along the roads after they have been knocked back to before they were born. We wouldn't do that if it were a human being. Why do we think it's okay and just drive by? Sometimes even running over them, again. 

We call them, "road kill". An offensive term. 

I miss our midnight guest. I miss him waking me with his strangely peculiar scent, and I regret not having stopped my car, taking him from the asphalt and placing him in a shady spot, under a tree or bush.

 I suppose the crows will clean him up. 

Friday, October 9, 2015

Who Am I...Really?

15 x 11
oil/ cold wax

Or maybe the question is; What Am I?

Jeff Lieberman, MIT graduate and scientist posed this idea in a TED talk:

Maybe I'm not a human being that has consciousness, 
maybe I'm consciousness that is shaped into a human being. 

He begins the talk by saying he is a community of cells, billions of cells, which are racing around his physical encapsulation. He's static, to our eyes, but he's actually in constant motion. Looking further, scientifically, those cells disappear into sheer energy, no form, no boundaries; pure, fantastic energy. 

In order for energy to manifest itself on this physical plane, it has to have a host form. I am not a scientist, not even close, but there is a knowing in what Lieberman says. It rings true.

Coincidentally, in Elizabeth Gilbert's new book, Big Magic, she writes about ideas being alive. To manifest themselves they need a human collaborator to move from the ether to a form that can be seen and appreciated by this human audience. 

If we can stay on this plane, what a magical, curious and surprising life. This is why we are driven to create. 

It's not in us, it's of us. 
It's around us. 
It envelopes us. 

And if we open our minds, our hearts, our arms, it will surround us with something so wonderful, there is no language to neither describe nor contain it. 

Thursday, October 1, 2015

At The Risk Of Looking Foolish

Dynamic Tension
22 x 30
mixed media

When I was 11 years old I won a citywide essay contest. The competition was open to all grade school and high school students. My picture was in the paper, along with a little article. It was a big deal, for me and my family; a proud moment.

When we're young, our parents indulge and encourage our fantasies and escapades; but as we get closer to leaving home, they begin to pour the syrup of reality over our dreams.

"Yes, it's wonderful that you like to (fill in your dream), but how are you going to support yourself? It takes a lot of luck to succeed at..... Perhaps it's better you study (fill in your "responsible" career)." 

Any tangible commodity guaranteed to make you employable and your parents, once again, proud and happy. 
"Thank god she got over that!" 

Out into the world  you go, years pass and suddenly you're in a place of dissatisfaction. You have more time, your days aren't filled with busy activities and there it is - that nugget of self denial that has been living quietly inside you since you veered off of your creative path. 

Only now, that there is more space, more internal silence, the nugget feels like a boulder.

My husband and I were having this conversation last night; about the risk of looking foolish. In the halcyon days of childhood, looking and acting foolish was part of our play, but when you're in your 50's, 60's, 70's and beyond, the risk of looking foolish can be paralyzing. 

Which is why, we don't risk, instead we avoid that thing that made us feel so alive. 

We can change that. 

Where does your curiosity lead you? -
and follow that.

What makes you forget about time and space? -
and reach for that.  

What makes you forget your self?-
be that. 

Do you want to leave this plane with a smile, knowing that you allowed yourself to access that unique grace within you? That you LIVED your life on fire and fanned the flames.
Wow - seems the risk of looking foolish is a very small price to pay when it allows you to find that incredible lightness of grace that was planted in you the day you were born. 

This is how I want to spend my life - collaborating to the best of my ability with forces of inspiration that I can neither see, nor prove, nor command, nor understand.
I can not think of a better way to pass my days. Elizabeth Gilbert; Big Magic 

I want that.